


Farewell

by TreesInYourEyes



Category: Dreamer Trilogy - Maggie Stiefvater, Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Bluesey - Freeform, F/M, Fireflies, Gangsey, M/M, Nino's, Sad and Happy, Summer, Takes place after the epilogue of TRK, The Barns (Raven Cycle), group hug, much love, pynch - Freeform, remembered, some CDTH easter eggs, some bad Latin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-27
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:01:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21986329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TreesInYourEyes/pseuds/TreesInYourEyes
Summary: Depending on where you began the story, this was where it ended...It's the night before Gansey and Blue leave for their one-year road trip - leaving Ronan and Adam behind.The four of them spend that last evening together before they take different paths...
Relationships: Richard Gansey III/Blue Sargent, Ronan Lynch/Adam Parrish
Comments: 17
Kudos: 66





	1. Chapter 1

Depending on where you began the story, this was where it ended.

This day would draw a line between everything that _was_ and everything that was about to _become_. This day would break time into two – into _before_ and _after_. It was the end of something that had always been supposed to come to an end eventually and yet it still took one by surprise.

_How were you supposed to feel on a day like this?_

Adam Parrish didn’t have an answer to that question. And though he had answers to a lot of questions – at least that’s what his friends and his Aglionby certificate told him – he couldn’t find the one sentiment that equaled with his current situation. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel anything but that he felt too much. And he couldn’t decide which feeling was the strongest one, the right one. He couldn’t decide which feeling he should let seep through the surface, taking control over his words and actions. Instead, he swam in this pool full of muddled up emotions. And though they were strong ones on their own, together they were nothing but a consistent buzzing in the back of his head, making his forehead ache and his body go numb.

In moments like this Adam was aching for his lost connection to Cabeswater. It would brush its leaves against his mind and breeze a cool drift through his heart to make him feel better, to help him see things clearer. But Cabeswater was dead so all Adam felt was the mild summer evening breeze that blew through the open window of his tricolored Hondayota, cooling his warm skin after a long day at work. The unsteady purring of his car was only interrupted by some Irish tunes playing of a rusty tape that wore the letters “Parrish’s Hondayota Alone Time”. Though he wasn’t listening, not really, but sorting through his confused mind, trying to figure out how he was supposed to feel on the last day before his two best friends – Richard Campbell Gansey III and Blue Sargent – were leaving for an entire year.

Leaving him and Ronan Lynch behind.

Adam spotted his boyfriend’s BMW in the parking lot as he drove through the driveway of Nino’s Pizzeria. He leaned against the hood of his car, features all dark and sharp, dressed completely in black with ripped jeans and muscle shirt, arms crossed in front of his chest, wearing a face that made you think twice about pulling over to ask for directions. Looking like death himself.

When Adam had first met him, when he barely knew this dark and mysterious creature that was Ronan Lynch, he couldn’t understand why someone like Gansey – a cherished, sophisticated soul – could be befriended with someone like Ronan – fighter of men, skipper of classes, king of the streets, a snake that probably didn’t even have a soul. But a year full of dreams and nightmares had changed things. Because it turned out Ronan could make both of these things real and somewhere between plotting a sham of the most gruesome crime and repairing a sentient dream forest, Adam, who had always been lonesome, had realized he wasn’t the only one feeling that way. Somewhere between mixtapes and hand lotion, he had learned he wasn’t as unknowable as he had always thought. Somewhere between Latin speaking trees and dream cattle he had fallen in love with that boy, who looked like a handsome version of death, but was in fact quite the opposite and instead of unmaking things, he created the fairest and liveliest creatures one could imagine.

Adam pulled in next to the black BMW, the sad excuse of his own car wincing and creaking when it came to a stop. 

Ronan was still leaning against his car, fidgeting with the leather straps around his wrist, his eyes fixed on the ground, his eyebrows furrowed, his jaw tense. For every bystander this posture was just another variable that added up to his intimidating “don’t fuck with me” attitude. But to Adam, it was quite clear that there was more to it. Ronan was definitely on edge. Just as worked up as Adam was about this day’s magnitude – probably even more, considering that Ronan hated nothing more than letting go of things he loved.

Adam turned off the engine and the forgotten music and got out of the driver’s seat. The familiar bang of the Hondayota’s door falling shut, ripped Ronan out of his trance, finally looking up and recognizing his company. He caught Adam’s eyes and a thin smile crept over his lips. This small sentiment was all that it took to transform Ronan, the devil, into Ronan, the boy who would dream you the world.

“You’re late, Parrish”, Ronan said, unfolding his arms and shoving his hands into his pockets. He gave him a wry grin which made it obvious to Adam that Ronan was trying to overplay his inner agitation by exaggerated cheerfulness.

“Nice to see you too, asshole”, Adam replied, brushing some dust off his trousers before scuffling next to Ronan and holding his hand out for a fist bump. But instead of knocking his knuckles against Adam’s, Ronan grabbed the seam of Adam’s T-shirt and pulled him in for a kiss.

For a moment Adam forgot all the anxiety and restlessness inside him and was just incredibly grateful that he wasn’t the one leaving today. That this wasn’t his farewell and that he still had the entire summer ahead of him. An entire summer full of late-night drives through Henrietta, of warm evenings at the barns, full of dreams and Ronan.

He felt Ronan’s grip fastening around his waist as if he was already fearing the moment he would have to let go.

“I think we’re being watched”, Adam mumbled under his breath when they broke after a few seconds.

“Fuck them.”

“No, I mean…” Adam pointed towards the window of Ronan’s car, where a small girl squinted right into their direction while gleefully chewing on an ice-scraper. “Why on earth did you bring her _here_ _?_ ”

Ronan turned around to look at their stalker who immediately ducked away as he caught her eyes.

“Jesus Mary, you little shit!” Ronan let go of Adam and ripped open the passenger door. A scream echoed through the parking lot that wasn’t quite human as Ronan grabbed Opal and muttered some unholy words to make clear what exactly he thought of this just now discovered stowaway.

“I told you a million times that you aren’t allowed in my car! Especially not today! Are these bite marks on the gearshift?”

Adam looked around to make sure nobody was watching them as the little girl Ronan had taken out of his dreams jumped out of the BMW, as always wearing a skull cap and an overlarge jumper, and threw a small tantrum that involved smashing the remains of the ice scraper at Ronan’s feet, stomping with her hooves on the asphalt and squeaking in a language neither of the boys understood in this world.

Adam was sure he heard some words that sounded quite like “boring” and “unfair”.

There wasn’t anything particularly funny about the situation, in fact, if anyone would examine them a bit closer and saw that the girl that was currently throwing pebbles at the car – which did not amuse Ronan _at all_ – didn’t have the typical girl legs but instead resembled a goat from the waist down, things could get complicated.

But for some reason the entire scene – Ronan swearing while trying to catch Opal’s grubby hands and stopping her from permanently damaging his car, Opal squealing and clinging to Adam’s leg, – was so _normal_ , well… _normal_ when you dated a dreamer, that it somehow made Adam remember again that this wasn’t only the end of things. Today wasn’t the end of the world, even when it had felt like it this morning and the hours he had worked at the garage and on his drive here. Gansey and Blue would move away, but the world wouldn’t stop moving without them. Their story wouldn’t be over.

This reminder lifted some weight off his chest and he started to laugh.

“What the fuck are you laughing about, Parrish?” Ronan complained but it was obvious that he must have had the same thought because for a moment some of the tension had left his face as well. Adam picked up Opal who was currently untying his shoelaces – or was she eating them? – and placed her on his shoulders. Her tiny hands grabbed for two strands of Adam’s hair and he was just hoping that she wouldn’t also start eating them.

It was going to be alright.


	2. Chapter 2

Richard Gansey III had forgotten how many times he had been told he was destined for greatness.

Though maybe he had been destined for this: him and Blue Sargent in his old, beloved Camaro, driving towards the end – or when you looked at it from the other side – towards the beginning of something. Something huge. It wasn’t what he had expected but here he was. Alive. Breathing. Next to the girl that wasn’t a psychic but could have easily been one. Next to the girl that made things louder but him quiet. Next to the girl that had killed him with her kiss and yet he was still here.

It had been this: stolen glances and forbidden touches. It had been secret late-night calls and secret late-night drives. It had been _I just want to pretend_ and _now we never speak of it again._

It had been him being able to sleep after he talked to her, it had been him feeling fully known for the first time. 

It had been her knowing she would kill her true love with a kiss. It had been her seeing his ghost on the ley line. It had been two mirrors turned towards each other, it had been their kiss, it had been him dying.

This had been how it was supposed to be.

It hadn’t been supposed to be this: his magicians and a forest’s sacrifice bringing him back to life.

Him living, being here with her. Him and her leaving for a cross-country road trip – accompanied by a boy who had just recently joined their adventure that was called life.

Them leaving, leaving their other half behind.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

And yet, never had anything felt more right.

“I still can’t believe you agreed on leaving the Pig behind,” Blue said grinning, her fingers dancing over the sill of the open Camaro window. The wind caught in her hair, a dozen of colorful clips desperately fighting to hold it together. She was wearing a green dress she had sewed together out of all sorts of fabrics. She looked so remarkably herself in it, Gansey could barely stand it.

“Me neither, Jane. Me neither.” His gaze wandered over the interior of his so well-beloved Camaro. There was a sting in his chest when he thought about leaving it behind but it was much more sensible to take Blue’s Camaro – which was a perfect portrayal of Gansey’s, except for the fact that it was missing an engine, which didn’t stop it from running anyway. In fact, it was running even better than the one in which they sat right now, which was one of the two reasons why they had decided it was better suited for a one-year road trip. Car breakdowns could get quite uncomfortable when you were in the middle of a third world country. The other reason was that it was the perfectly green car and _reducing your carbon footprint is more than just buying a fair-trade coffee to impress your girlfriend, isn’t it, Gansey?_

So yes, Gansey had agreed to leave the Pig behind. Tomorrow morning, they would leave his car at the Fox Way and would take Blue’s instead – it was already equipped with everything one could need on a road trip. It shouldn’t matter in the end – both cars were pulled out of Ronan Lynch’s head so practically neither of them was the original. But still, the sting was there.

“I still can’t believe we’re actually leaving tomorrow,” Gansey said then, shaking his head.

“Me neither,” Blue said quietly, her glance wandering from the street ahead of them to Gansey. They locked eyes for a second and Gansey saw his own feelings quite well reflected on her face. This radiating happiness and excitement for all the adventures that were ahead of them but also this irrepressible fear that came with leaving behind almost everything that felt familiar, of almost everything they loved.

This trip – it had always felt like the sort of thing you would always talk about but everyone secretly knew it would never actually happen. Like when you would tell people you were going to find a dead Welsh king but no one would truly believe you.

But you would do it anyway.

They were going to do this: Gansey, Blue and Henry would travel through America – their final destination: Venezuela. Tomorrow morning, they would finally open this new book, all pages still unwritten. Gansey couldn’t wait to fill them.

This was their year. Their life.

It was going to be spectacular.

And yet his chest hurt. They weren’t leaving forever, they would come back, they would! But things would change. There were so many things he would miss. Not only his car but also Monmouth Manufacturing was no longer registered under his name and soon this city would no longer be his home. Henrietta – the first thing he had ever fallen in love with.

Their time at Aglionby was over. Their hunt for Glendower was over.

 _Gansey-Lynch-Parrish_ was over. It had always been the three of them, hadn’t it? Until Blue came. And now this was going to change.

Now he was leaving Ronan and Adam behind. His best friends, his brothers, his magicians.

All these years he had been the one being afraid of his friends walking away from him. And now _he_ was the one walking away.

_Will they still be here for me when I’m coming back?_

“ _Hey_ ,” Blue said softly and gripped for Gansey’s hand, which was tensely clutching the steering wheel. “They won’t forget about you. About us.” She took his hand and squeezed it tightly. “They will be okay.”

She gave him a comforting smile and he squeezed her hand back, returning the smile.

It was going to be alright. 

Ronan and Adam were already waiting for them in the parking lot when they finally arrived at Nino’s.

Though they didn’t recognize the orange Camaro at first because they were too occupied with a little girl that was sitting on Adam’s shoulders, her tiny, grubby fists buried in his hair while she kicked at Ronan, who was currently trying to shove some yellow gumboots onto her hooves, not without using some heavy swear words. Adam looked a bit in pain because angry little girl fingers and hair wasn’t a good combination, but he was also laughing, saying something to Ronan Gansey couldn’t quite catch. Ronan let out a hoarse laugh and let go of Opal who used the chance to kick off the boots again.

They were going to be alright. Of course they were.

“Look at these two,” Blue called out in a sweet voice as Gansey pulled in next to Ronan’s black BMW. “If these aren’t the parents of the year…”

Their friends turned around, Ronan making an inappropriate gesture at Blue before bumping knuckles with her through the open window. Adam caught Gansey’s eyes and smiled, meanwhile Opal was completely ignoring the new arrivals but was cheerfully wiggling her hooves she had successfully freed from the yellow rubber enemy.

“How does it feel to be grandpa, dad?” Ronan leaned into the car and gave Gansey that notorious smirk Gansey had to endure for many years now. He just rolled his eyes and got out of the driver’s door. _At least_ , he thought, _I won’t have to put up with Ronan’s juvenile jokes while I’m gone._

He had asked Ronan a few weeks ago whether he wanted to come along on their trip – he hadn’t asked Adam because he knew he was going to college and he also knew that nothing and no one could stop him. But he had asked Ronan. Of course, he had said no – _dreamers are tied to their nests,_ he had said, _and I would rather eat shit than spending a year with Cheng_ but Gansey assumed the main reason for his rejection was currently trying to get a dreamed, goat-legged girl off his shoulders, desperately trying to untie her fingers from his dusty, unevenly cropped hair.

“For fuck’s sake!” Ronan hissed and grabbed Opal’s arms to pull her off Adam. “Stop being a nuisance.”

She shook her head so hard, Gansey was afraid it might fall off. But Ronan just sat her roughly down onto the ground and knelt next to her.

“You have two options: Either you stop being a fucking scourge right now, put on these damn boots and come with us or,” he paused to turn her chin towards him to get her attention, “or you spend the rest of the night inside that trunk.” He pointed at the trunk of his BMW. “Your choice.”

Opal spat out some words she had probably picked up from Ronan and probably wasn’t allowed to use, then she bit into his finger. Ronan cussed and put his bleeding finger into his mouth. Adam chuckled. Gansey raised his eyebrows.

Blue said, “Sweet, Ronan,” and got to her knees to face Opal.

“Hey,” she said in a soft voice and lightly touched the little girl’s cheek. “You’re so pretty.” She smiled at her before reaching for the abandoned boots on the ground. “I always wanted boots like these. I’m sure you would look even prettier in these.”

“Hooves are better,” Opal squeaked, although Blue had definitely caught her attention because she was eyeing quite fascinated her colorful hair clips. Blue recognized Opal’s staring and pulled one green clip that was shaped like a leaf out of her hair and offered it to Opal. Opal took it and turned it around in her tiny hands.

“You can have it if you want to,” Blue said in a kind voice, slowly closing Opal’s fingers around the hairclip. Ronan huffed but Blue dismissively held up her hand to silence him. “You just have to put on these beautiful boots and play nice for the rest of the night and it’s yours.”

Opal chewed on her lip like she was considering it, then she snapped the gumboots out of Blue’s hands and scuffled underneath the car to put them on in private. Blue got up again and grinned triumphantly at Ronan, who shot her a skeptical glance. He clearly wasn’t convinced by her educational measures.

“Don’t give me that look, Lynch. I learned from the best.” She glanced at Gansey, who opened his mouth to protest but couldn’t quite come up with a snappy reply because he was too busy picturing Blue handling her own kids. _Their_ own kids. It was a dumb and childish thought but dumb and childish thoughts had the habit of being hard to shove away once they flickered up in your mind. And one got to admit that Blue/Gansey offsprings would indeed be very dazzling.

“I’m starving,” Adam sighed and rubbed the back of his hand across his forehead. “Let’s get off this sticky parking lot and eat some pizza.”

Everyone who hadn’t bumped knuckles yet, bumped knuckles.

In they went.


	3. Chapter 3

---  
  
One might say remembering was a lot like scrying. Only backwards. Instead of looking into the future, you took a look into your past.

The upside was that you didn’t need any psychic skills for it. The downside was that you often couldn’t control it so the memories would just wash over you, swap you from your feet and pull you into a deep ocean full of sentimentality and nostalgia.

When Blue walked into Nino’s she wasn’t prepared for the flood of memories that immediately swept over her.

That familiar _ding_ of the doorbell that chimed every time a new customer entered the restaurant reminded her of the first time she had met Gansey, Ronan and Adam. It reminded her of how she had thought she knew everything about the world back then. Including everything about the infamous and contemptuous Raven Boys.

The odor of greasy cheese and fresh basil reminded her of many summer evenings spent squeezed into a booth, the five – no she had miscounted, the _four_ of them pursuing magic and ley lines, Welsh kings and dreams.

The entire place reminded her of everything that had been – of everything she never had thought could ever happen. How would have her life played out if Gansey hadn’t approached her that day?

“Hey Sargent, remember when Gansey was a true womanizer and called you a prostitute?” Ronan said before sliding into the nearest booth. Adam, who monitored Opal to sit beneath the table (she seemed quite pleased with that allotment and immediately started to pick some forgotten pizza crumbs from the floor), sat down next to him. The restaurant wasn’t quite filled yet but there was already a fair amount of Aglionby students scattered around the tables. Blue was quite happy at that moment, knowing she would never have to work here ever again. She had quitted the job a few months ago because she had been too busy with graduation and planning a road trip. And she couldn’t say she missed it (apart from the good wage). Too many Raven Boys that weren’t _her_ Raven Boys and therefore complete bastards.

“Oh, how could I ever forget.” Blue skidded onto the opposite bench so she was facing Ronan. “ _How did you meet your boyfriend, Blue? Well, that’s a lovely story. He came up to me trying to hook me up with his best friend_ and _called me a prostitute. Love at first sight, you see_.” She placed her elbows on the table, propping up her chin with one hand and grinned at Gansey who was dropping down next to her.

Gansey was dressed at his most _Ganseyness_ possible. He was wearing a yellow polo shirt – his favorite polo shirt – cargo pants and his beloved boat shoes. Blue knew him for over a year now and she still hadn’t managed to approve of his style decisions. But she also wasn’t bothered by it anymore. The polo shirts and boat shoes were just as much a part of Gansey as his hazel eyes and his heartfelt laugh. She couldn’t help herself but love them.

“I’m gonna apologize for this unpropitious demeanor for the rest of my life,” Gansey said sorrowfully and put down his glasses to rub his eyes. “God, I was so young and naïve back then,” he muttered and buried his face in Blue’s shoulder, who comfortingly patted his hair. “I’m so sorry you had to put up with that prat.”

“Yeah, me too,” Blue replied smiling and slung one of her arms around him. “If it comforts you, you’re getting a little less pratty every day. Must be my good influence.”

Gansey made an approving noise.

“I can’t believe this was last year,” Adam said, narrowing his eyebrows in disbelief. “Feels like ages ago.”

“ _Jesus_ , I tried to hook you up with Blue.” Gansey lifted his head as if he just now remembered. “ _Oh_ _god_.”

Ronan laughed. “Look how well that turned out.” He tousled Adam’s hair and put his arm around his shoulders. Adam smiled kind of sheepishly, casting down his eyes.

_How things could change in a little more than a year_ , Blue wondered. Back in November, when she had first found out about Ronan and Adam being a thing, she did not know what to make of it.

She couldn’t say that she had it seen coming but she also couldn’t say that she was surprised. The more she thought about it – the more she saw of them growing into this new relationship – the more sense it made. So much more sense than she and Adam ever had.

Adam and Blue had always cut each other when their sharp edges had met. But Adam and Ronan – their edges were sharpening each other.

It had taken her a couple of weeks to get used to this new constellation, but now she couldn’t imagine it any other way.

“I think I’m gonna get an avocado pizza,” Gansey said, putting his glasses back on before skimming through the menu.

“Sometimes I wonder how we ever became friends,” Ronan muttered and snatched the menu out of Gansey’s hands. “Avocado on pizza? Seriously man, this should be a crime. That’s even worse than pineapple.”

“There is nothing wrong with pineapple on pizza,” Adam said and got an approving look from Gansey and an appalled look from Ronan. Blue didn’t have an opinion on that matter so he did not get a look from her.

Ronan closed his eyes in exaggerated pain and said, “ _Hoc est finem in nobis_.”

“ _Forma bonum fragile est_ ,” Adam replied smiling.

“Ugh, you two are the worst!” Blue leaned back into her seat. “We should also invent a secret language, Gansey. So we can also flirt without them understanding us.”

“Latin is not a secret language,” Ronan argued. “And if Gansey would’ve paid a little more attention in class –”

“First of all,” Gansey cut him off and held up his hand like a teacher interrupting a noisy student, “you’re literally the last person that is allowed to say that. And second, what did I have you two for? There was no point in studying it when I got two perfect interpreters right next to me.” He cleared his throat. “I mean…until a we got to that point where you _didn’t_ want me to understand you…”

Ronan grinned. Adam tried not to. Blue laughed.

“But yes, Jane,” Gansey continued, turning to Blue, “I indeed agree on that one. Let’s learn Spanish while we’re in Venezuela.”

“Deal.” She held out her hand, he took it and shook it formally.

“Deal.”

“Cute,” Ronan contributed.

“I had Spanish for 5 years in school,” Adam grinned.

Blue blinked at him and said very simply, “I hate you.”

“Hold on a second.” Gansey got out his phone and typed something into it. It reminded Blue of her own phone that was sitting in her pocket – it was still a very unfamiliar feeling. She had just very recently got one from Maura because no woman of Blue’s size should ever go on a road trip without having a device to call for help if attacked by thugs or bears. And because Blue’s reasoning that her pink switchblade as well as Calla’s three months survival training didn’t require any help of others if attacked by thugs or bears did not change her mother’s mind, Blue owned a phone now. It wasn’t that bad to have one after all. It made secret late-night talks a lot easier.

“How about… _Wayow? Wayou_?” Gansey said, staring at his phone, struggling on pronouncing whatever he wanted to say correctly. “Apparently it‘s spoken by over 305.000 people in Venezuela.”

“You mean _Wayuu_? The Wayuu language?” Adam leaned over the table as Gansey showed the phone to him.

“Don’t tell me you speak that one, too,” Blue said with raised eyebrows.

“Ha, no,” Adam laughed. “Don’t worry. I just looked up some stuff about Venezuela, that’s all.”

“You do know you’re not part of their honeymoon, do you, Parrish?” Ronan bumped his arm against Adam’s, who just rolled his eyes.

“I just wanted to know where the three of you are going. So I know what you guys are talking about when you tell us of all the things you’ve seen.” Adam shrugged as if it wasn’t big of a deal. Blue – who knew how busy Adam was with just surviving – felt the urge to hug him.

“Maybe I do not hate you after all,” she said instead and reached over the table to squeeze his hand. He squeezed back and smiled at her.

He still had that gaunt and beautiful face she had once thought she had fallen in love with. She hadn’t but this didn’t mean she did not love him. She loved all them so fiercely, they were like family. Adam, he was like this complicated but beautiful creature she’d never fully understand but that was always giving her strength by just _being_. Ronan was like the brother she never wanted but couldn’t live without. And Gansey. Blue didn’t need a fulfilled prophecy to know he was her true love.

Leaving them hurt just as much as leaving 300 Fox Way.

She did not want to leave them. She did not want this to be over. She did not want _them_ to be over.

“I’m surprised you haven’t learned all the facts about that shithole by heart yet,” Ronan said to Gansey, which ripped Blue out of her spiraling thoughts. She let go of Adam's hand and blinked some tears away.

“Did you give up your scout uniform and left Cheng with all the tomes?”

“Henry isn’t much of a reader,” Gansey replied and pulled a mint leaf out of his pocket. “And who do you think I am?”

“He’s bought an over a thousand pages long book with everything one could want to know about Venezuela – if you lived a 100 years ago – and is reading it every night but seems like he hasn’t got to the chapter _Languages_ just yet,” Blue said smirking, shoved away her bleeding heart and hooked her arm around Gansey’s. He smelled of mint and something else, something sweet she couldn’t name – something familiar.

“This book – it’s so fascinating, honestly!” Gansey’s entire face lit up when he thought about his excessive literature choices. “Just yesterday I read that part about –”

A stupendously loud scream that didn’t sound quite human echoed from the kitchen and made all of them jump. It was followed by some more screams that sounded very human indeed.

Ronan glanced underneath the table.

_“Fuck.”_


	4. Chapter 4

Ronan Lynch had managed to get thrown out of many facilities in his yet so short life.

A shopping center, because apparently, they had not meant ravens when they had hung up the sign “pets allowed”.

A bar, because a fight between him and his older brother Declan had gotten too loud and too violent so they were not so kindly advised to please continue this brawl outside.

The school grounds, because _Aglionby Academy has zero toleration for this kind of behavior._

These were just a few examples. And Ronan didn’t care much about any of these expulsions. If someone couldn’t handle the force that was Ronan Lynch, it wasn’t his problem. He did care though when he as well as all of his friends got thrown out of Nino’s that night because his _little cousin from Syracuse_ was not behaving like a _little cousin from Syracuse_ was supposed to behave but more like a rabid animal.

“I can’t believe this just happened,” Adam said, as the four of them were back in the parking lot, the sun already down, their stomachs still empty, a crying dreamchild in Ronan’s arms and a very furious chef slamming the door shut right in front of them, swearing them all – especially Ronan and his naughty _cousin_ – to hell.

“This was… unpleasant.” Gansey scratched his head and looked towards the windows where a bunch of Aglionby students he probably knew from school had gathered to stare at them. This little turmoil had gained them everyone’s attention.

Ronan was still holding Opal, who was still crying and slamming her little fists against his chest.

She had ruined it. Of course she had.

She was as unpredictable as he was.

He should have known better.

And now the last night he had with his friends was ruined.

 _He_ had ruined it.

He should have known better.

He wanted to smash something.

“God damn it, will you shut the fuck up now,” Ronan grumbled as he opened the trunk of his BMW and tried to squeeze his screaming psychopomp into it. Some of the gawping boys and their female dates from the windows were craving their necks and made huge eyes because _was he putting a child into the trunk of his car?!_

“Maybe you shouldn’t…,” Adam began but Ronan had already slammed the trunk door shut, Opal securely sealed inside. She immediately went quiet. Maybe she knew she had strained Ronan’s nerves enough for today. Or maybe she was eating the trash Ronan had forgotten to throw away. The latter was much more likely.

“ _Wow_ ,” Blue exhaled, “this was…” She shook her head as if there were no words to describe this disaster and then – to everyone’s surprise – she broke into loud, heavy laughter. So heavy, she needed to lean against the Camaro so she wouldn’t fall over. Gansey looked terrified and moved a step back from her as if he was afraid she might be possessed. Ronan frowned at her as if she had just lost her mind. Adam’s eyes wandered to Blue, then to Ronan and Gansey, and then – to Ronan’s and Gansey’s surprise – he also started laughing.

“What. The. Fuck.” Ronan said, glancing at Gansey, who seemed just as confused as he was by their friends’ joyful reaction to this unjoyful turn of events.

“Oh man,” Blue said chuckling, holding her stomach and trying to catch her breath. “I’m gonna miss this so much.”

“Nino’s?” Gansey asked confused. “I’m sure I can convince –”

She shook her head again and stumbled into Gansey, who – still very irritated – put his arms around her waist to steady her.

“Nooo, I mean _this!_ ” She swirled her hand in front of her face, still grinning like a madwoman. “The absurdity of it all. It’s hilarious!”

“We just got thrown out of our favorite hangout. And I’m still starving. I don’t know what’s so funny about that,” Gansey said though his lips were already starting to betray him and slowly curling into a smile. “And stop grinning like that, Parrish!”

Adam didn’t stop grinning like that but instead stepped next to Ronan (who was still angry at himself because he should’ve known better) and put one arm around his shoulders and brushed his other hand across Ronan’s shaved head.

“Let’s just drive to the Barns,” he said gently and kissed Ronan’s cheek. “There nobody will be bothered by ill-behaved dreams.”

Adam smiled at him. This amiable, elastic grin Ronan would start wars and burn cities for. It swiped away all guilt and anger Ronan had felt until this moment.

And when Ronan looked at Gansey now, he didn’t see the same smile but the typical _Gansey smil_ e he smiled whenever he realized how lucky and strange and loved they all were. No feral girl with goat legs could ruin this.

He should have known better.

He exhaled and a grin sneaked across his own face.

Then he said, “We really should get going before one of these dickheads calls the police because of child maltreatment.”

His friends laughed and they all got into their cars.

The Barns were even more magical at night than they were at daylight.

Fireflies or things that looked quite like fireflies but weren’t, illuminated the dark and revealed odd and beautiful dream creatures of all kinds, slowly creeping around the trees that surrounded the old farmhouse. Creatures that were only slightly different than their archetypes from the real world, but also creatures that didn’t look like anything familiar, creatures that weren’t bound to the rules of physics or nature – only to the boundless space that was Ronan Lynch’s imagination. There were stacks with more than just the usual two antlers, there were birds with feathers that glowed in the dark. There were creatures that in one moment looked quite like a cat, but in the next, one wondered how anyone could have ever thought it resembled a cat, wasn’t it more like a horse? Or a swan? Or something… _otherworldly?_

As the black BMW, the tricolored Hondayota and the orange Camaro rolled one after another onto the driveway of the Barns, all these whimsical creatures peeked at them from the shadows, making sure their guests were friendly and didn’t mean any harm to their kingdom, making sure their king – their dreamer, their _Greywaren_ – was with them. The Barns – they were Ronan’s fortress, Ronan’s childhood, Ronan’s home. He was tied to this place by more strings than just blood and memories. How he loved and hated it.

The three cars, two of them just another forgery pulled out of a Lynches’ head, came to a stop right next to the main building, its white wood paneling almost glowing in the dark. One after another, the cars’ engines turned off until the only noise left was the chirping of dream and non-dream crickets, as well as the soft rustling of leaves in the gentle evening breeze.

Ronan got out of his car, walked around it and opened the trunk. To his surprise, Opal didn’t continue her hysterical fit from before but was quietly staring at _something_ she was holding in her grubby hands. She almost seemed mesmerized by it because she didn’t even look up as Ronan touched her cheek. And then he saw that the _something_ was a _dream_ thing. A dream thing he had tossed into the trunk after he had accidentally dreamt it during a nap in his car. He remembered how he had woken with it, just a few weeks ago – the sheer impossibility of it breaking his brain.

It was a word. A word you could cup in your hands. It was neither written nor spoken and yet still there, the letters pulled out of his subconsciousness.

_remembered_

He snatched it out of Opal’s hands, who immediately snapped out of her trance, and bundled it into an old Aglionby sweater that was lying next to her. He couldn’t bear to look at it. It made him feel like he had broken a promise. Like he had forgotten something he had promised not to. 

“Piss off, you little puke,” he said and sat Opal onto the still sun-warmed gravel, where she immediately scurried away – probably to go rummaging in the woods.

“Please tell me you’ve got something to eat in that house!” Gansey shouted as he and Blue got out of the Camaro, the old tires wincing as they slammed the doors shut.

“Look at all these lights!” Blue’s grin grew wide as she spotted all the magic that was swirling around and above them. She caught an orb – a tiny ball of light – that was twirling above her head and held it in her cupped hands to examine it closer. It escaped and bounced against her nose before soaring away again. She laughed and reached for another one. Gansey was as fascinated by the magic as Blue so he joined her little dance and together they scampered after the hovering lights, laughing and clinging to each other, radiating the sort of happiness that – just by looking at it – mended and broke your heart at the same time.

“Blue is for sure the best thing that ever happened to Gansey,” Adam said matter-of-factly, as he climbed next to Ronan, who was sitting on his open car trunk. “The trip will do them good.”

Ronan didn’t respond but glanced at Adam whose face was illuminated by the taillights of the BMW as well as the little orbs that had settled in his hair. His fine features were stark against the blackness of the night and his skin was dipped into an even warmer and livelier color than usual. How many hours Ronan had spent with just staring at this young man’s face. How he would miss it once summer was over.

Missing Gansey and Blue was one thing. Their departure was the end of a story Ronan didn’t want to finish writing just yet. It was the falling curtain of a play where Ronan had loved and known all his parts by heart in every single act.

_Friend, brother, dreamer._

Missing Gansey and Blue would feel like missing an arm or a leg. It would hurt immensely and it would affect his life in numerous forms but he would get used to it eventually.

Missing Adam would be something else entirely. Missing Adam would feel like missing a vital organ, like missing a lung. It would feel like suffocating, like never getting enough air no matter how deep a breath he took. Missing Adam meant fighting every single day just to make it to the next. It meant saving every bit of oxygen in matter of survival.

Ronan didn’t want to feel that way – nobody wanted to get their lung ripped out of their body – but Ronan was ready to make this sacrifice, as long as Adam – 

“They will come back,” Adam said softly and then he added as if he had read Ronan’s thoughts, “and I will, too.”

Though Adam was indeed a psychic, he wasn’t the sort of psychic that could read other people’s minds. Yet, he didn’t need any psychic powers to _read_ Ronan. It was the kind of clairvoyance that came with _observing_ and _understanding_ another soul. That came with _knowing._

“I know,” Ronan said, his eyes carefully studying Adam’s light eyelashes that were glinting in the shine of the fireflies. He felt like he already needed to start filling his oxygen supplies. Like he already needed to memorize every inch that was Adam Parrish in its tiniest detail so he wouldn’t suffocate once he had to hold his breath.

Adam moved a bit closer so their shoulders and knees were touching. “We still got all summer,” he mumbled then, very quietly and leaned his head against Ronan’s – the orbs that had been resting in his hair spiraling away. Ronan took a deep breath. They still got all summer.

_“_ Hey, guys! _”_ Blue called out from where she and Gansey were still surrounded by blinking lights. “How do you feel about making a campfire plus some old-fashioned stick bread and marshmallows?”

“ _Stick bread?_ ” Adam asked confused and Ronan lifted his head to shoot him a shocked look because who did not know _goddamn stick bread?_

Adam Parrish, apparently. Because Adam Parrish had grown up in hell and he did not have had a father who had told him stories about Irish heroes and heroines, about deceitful dragons and guileful griffins, next to a rustling fire. He did not have had a mother who made the biggest bowl of yeast dough for her sons to wrap around some sticks they had collected in the woods and who would hum her husband’s favorite songs while the entire family huddled around the crackling bonfire.

Adam Parrish did not have had a childhood like that. Robert Parrish had made sure of that. And though Ronan Lynch could do a lot of things, things the majority of 18-year-olds couldn’t do, he couldn’t turn back time and stop Adam’s father from ruining his son’s life. He wanted to but he couldn’t. So, he did the only thing that was within his powers.

“Parrish,” Ronan said determined, slid off the car and held out his hand. Adam grabbed it and Ronan pulled him to his feet as well. “Stick bread is one of the world’s fucking best inventions and we will make this shit all summer so you’ll never have to ask that stupid question again, you hear me?”

“Sounds promising,” Adam grinned. Ronan smirked back and slammed the trunk door of his BMW shut before turning to Blue and Gansey, who were still all enthralled by the swirling around magic and especially each other, and advised them very loudly that the fire wouldn’t burn without them moving their asses. Then he put his arm around Adam’s shoulders, who put his arm around Ronan’s waist so the two of them walked like a four-legged creature towards the front porch before stumbling into the kitchen to make some goddamn stick bread like Adam Parrish had deserved to do years ago.


	5. Chapter 5

"You think we can still eat these?”

“Hell yes.”

“The expiration date does not agree.”

“Feed Chainsaw some and see if she drops dead.”

“Chainsaw eats _trash_ and doesn’t drop dead. She hardly qualifies as a tester.”

“Stop being a smartass, Parrish.”

Adam Parrish was skeptically inspecting a bag of very old, very ominous looking marshmallows Ronan had found underneath his little brother’s bed, next to some dirty laundry. They were all sitting around an improvised campfire, built out of some timber and trash Gansey and Blue had dug up somewhere, the barns quietly sleeping next to them.

“Marshmallows don’t go bad. Too much sugar.” Blue leaned over to reach into the package Adam was still suspicious of and started piercing a dozen of marshmallows onto a stick she had sharpened with her pink switchblade. Really, it was more like a spear than a stick and Adam was sure Blue could easily handle it like one. _Three months of survival training à la Calla plus some advice from Mr. Gray_ , she had said earlier. Adam knew this was serious business.

“ _Snack!”_ Chainsaw squawked. She was sitting between Adam and Ronan – the three of them squeezed onto an upside-down wooden crate, Gansey and Blue on another – and plucked impatiently on the back of Adam’s hand.

“Hey!” Adam said and smacked her sharp beak away. “Stop that or you won’t get any.”

 _“Snack!”_ she creaked again. _“Atom! Snack snack snack!”_

“Jesus. Did she just say _Adam?_ ” Gansey’s eyes went big while he was wrapping some yeast dough around a branch that didn’t look half as dangerous as Blue’s.

 _“Atom!”_ The raven lady bounced up and down, and flapped her ink-black wings, demanding Adam’s attention and especially the sweets he was holding in his hands. _“Atom! Snack!”_

She was indeed trying to say his name though her lack of lips didn’t allow her to pronounce the second syllable quite properly. Adam caught Ronan’s eyes, the latter boy wearing a smug smirk on his face. Adam, who knew how Chainsaw learned most of her words – by constant repeating, imitating Ronan’s voice – now also knew how Ronan had filled his spare time when Adam wasn’t around. He couldn’t suppress a stupid grin as he imagined Ronan spending day after day with saying his name over and over again until Chainsaw had added it to her scarce vocabulary.

 _“Aaatom!”_ she squeaked again, louder this time, throwing her head back. Then she turned to Ronan and said _“Kerah?”_ as if demanding some appreciation for her newly acquired verbal skills.

“Looks like someone did their homework.” Ronan scratched Chainsaw on the top of her head, her pitch-black feathers gleaming in the firelight. She croaked happily. Adam laughed and gave the raven the much-desired treat. She gulped it down at once.

“Can you teach her to say my name, too?” Gansey asked eagerly. He was still desperately trying to get the dough to stick to this branch and as Blue saw the tragedy, she sighed and took it from him to do it the right way.

“It’s not raven shaped enough,” Ronan replied. “ _Dick_ might work though.”

“Yeah, bite me, Lynch.”

Ronan sneered and made Chainsaw hop onto his wrist, her sharp talons digging into his leather bracelets. “Enough sugar for today. Go eat some rats!” he said to her and raised his arm so the bird took off and vanished into the dark sky.

Blue gave the newly, professionally wrapped bread stick back to Gansey while her own speared marshmallows were begging for mercy as she held them over the dancing flames. The two of them started talking about their trip. They started talking about all the states they were going to tour, the mountains they wanted to climb, the trees they needed to save. Ronan told some stories his father had told him about his journeys and some stories his father had told him about his journeys that were actually about his dreams.

Adam listened to Gansey’s fervor, to Blue’s excitement and Ronan’s tales. He read their faces, their gestures, the space between the lines. He glimpsed the quandary in Blue’s and Gansey’s eyes, the thrill and the anxiety, the _wanting to leave_ and the _wanting to stay_.

He sensed the sorrow that was filling Ronan, his voice too loud in one moment and too quiet in the next. Fingernails working on the leather on his wrist, one foot hooked around Adam’s, a wry grin wrapped around it all to hide his bleeding heart.

Adam saw the love, the happiness, the pain. He felt it all hammering against his own chest, unsure which one was the loudest.

_How were you supposed to feel on a day like this?_

Adam didn’t think there was an answer to this question. There was no right and no wrong. All these complicated feelings that were reflected on his friends' faces as well as on his own, they all were equally true. Equally right.

_How were you supposed to feel on a day like this?_

_You were supposed to_ feel.

He closed his eyes for a second, the fire warming his skin, the voices of the others an even harmony – just missing two more tunes to make it complete – no, he had miscounted. Not two. One. _His_.

Why had he thought it was two?

 _“Parrish?_ ” Ronan nudged his shoulder against Adam’s. “You okay?”

Adam opened his eyes again. They all had gone quiet and were staring at him. Gansey was currently burning some marshmallows and was playing with Blue’s hair. Blue was leaning against him, her feet that were tucked into some colorful socks were resting on Adam’s lap. Ronan was eating the leftovers of campfire bread and was attentively studying Adam’s pensive expression.

Adam said, “Have you ever got the feeling that something is missing? Or… some _one_?”

Blue’s sat up straight as if she had just remembered something. Then she frowned as if she had already forgotten it again.

Gansey nodded. Then shook his head.

Ronan’s eyebrows were furrowed like he was thinking very hard. Then he mumbled, “ _Remembered_ …”

 _Remembered_.

_Remembered._

_Remembered._

The magician, the dreamer, the resurrected king, and the psychic’s daughter sat all in complete silence for a while, everyone digging through their minds, everyone trying to remember, trying to grab something that seemed so close but was yet out of reach. Searching for forgotten ghosts inside their heads, finding memories that were out of tune, feeling holes inside their hearts.

They couldn’t shape it into a word, couldn’t shape into a name, couldn’t shape it into a face.

But they all felt it. Something – _someone_ – was missing. Robbed from their memories. Eliminated from existence.

In that moment they all felt it.

And then the moment was over and Chainsaw plunged right at the almost empty bag of marshmallows and snatched it out of Blue’s hands before fluttering away again. They all started laughing and Blue curled into Gansey’s arms and Ronan took Adam’s hand and kissed it, as if they all had already forgotten what they had thought about a second before.


	6. Chapter 6

---  
  
The night was coming to an end.

The food was empty, their stomachs were full. The fire was burnt down, their time was up.

Ronan and Blue went inside to do some cleaning, while Adam and Gansey remained outside, slowly walking towards the front porch, the light from the kitchen windows illuminating their steps.

Adam’s hands were buried in his pockets, his mouth was a straight line. Gansey felt restless. He felt like he needed to tell him so many things before he left and at the same time, he had no idea how to fill the silence between them. 

After a few silent steps, Adam said, “When will you hit the road tomorrow?”

“I told Henry we will pick him up at seven a.m.,” Gansey replied, relieved to have started a conversation. He checked his phone. “Christ, I didn’t think it would already be this late. Though I don’t think I will get much sleep tonight anyway.” He rubbed his eyes and sighed.

“Did you already say goodbye to your parents?”

“Yes, I visited them yesterday. Mom wouldn’t stop crying. She wanted me to pass the best regards to you, by the way. And I’m supposed to tell you that you’re always welcome in their house.”

Adam smiled thinly. They came to a stop next to their cars, the orange of the Camaro barely visible in the dark. The moon was full and its gloomy light drew long and sinister shadows onto the driveway – imitating the dance of the nearby standing oak trees, their branches all tangled up around and into each other like a lover’s embrace.

Gansey kicked some gravel with his foot aside, nervously chewing on his bottom lip. This was harder than he had thought. “So…”, he said eventually. “College?”

“Yeah, college,” Adam nodded and rubbed his forehead. “I haven’t heard back from any yet. But it shouldn’t take that long anymore until they send out the letters.”

“What’s your first choice again?”

“Princeton. It’s much closer than Harvard or Yale, only about 4 hours, so…” Adam glanced towards the kitchen window where he spotted Ronan’s silhouette. He and Blue were goofing around, laughing loudly about something only they knew. It was a sound Gansey never wanted to forget.

“You two will be okay, yes?” Gansey looked back at Adam, whose gaze was still fixed on their laughing friends. “You’ll look after each other? Even when summer’s over?”

Adam turned his face back to Gansey. “Of course. Don’t worry about us.” He gave Gansey a reassuring smile. “We will make it work when I’m off to college. I’m sure.”

“Just... you can always call me. If something happens or if you need anything. I’m not out of the world, don’t forget that.”

 _Don’t forget me,_ he thought but didn’t dare to say. It sounded somehow pathetic.

“I won’t. We won’t.” Adam held his hand out for a fist bump. Gansey smiled and knocked his knuckles against Adam’s.

“Also,” Adam started and knotted his fingers together like he often did when he wanted to say something that was important to him, “I wanted to apologize.”

“For what?”

“For being such a shitty friend last year. For misinterpreting your friendship for charity over and over again.”

“No, Adam, it’s –”

Adam cut him off, “No. All you ever wanted was to help and I always shoved you away. That wasn’t okay. And I’m sorry for that. I really am.”

Gansey looked down and shook his head. “I was silly and naïve and totally oblivious. You had every right to push me away. I am the one who should apologize.”

Adam chuckled lightly and gazed up at the night sky that was covered with thousands of luminous stars. “I didn’t mean for you to turn this around. This apology wasn’t supposed to cost you anything. I just wanted you to know that I will try my best to do better in the future.”

_The future._

Gansey’s eyes met Adam’s and suddenly he understood what his friend wanted from him. Because he didn’t want anything. So often his friends had come to him because they had wanted him to say something. To _give_ them something one couldn’t buy for money. An advice, a promise, a reassurance. But Adam didn’t want anything from Gansey that night. Instead, he wanted to give _him_ something. An apology and the assurance of a future that held both of them. The promise that their friendship wouldn’t be over after this day.

“Thank you,” Gansey said because it had to be said. “For everything.”

And then he hugged Adam because he had never hugged him before. He didn’t know why they had never done it – it just had never felt right. But it would’ve felt wrong not to do it on this day. This night. Gansey pulled him close, his face pressed into Adam’s shoulder. Adam carefully folded his arms around Gansey’s back and returned the hug. Gansey exhaled and closed his eyes.

Then he heard the front door swing open and Blue saying, “Group hug!” before he felt her slinging her short arms around the two of them, her hair tickling Gansey’s neck.

Adam mumbled, “Don’t ruin this, Lynch,” and Ronan replied, “You guys are fucking gross,” but then Gansey also felt Ronan’s arm closing around his shoulders. So now the four of them stand like this in the dark, knotted together, listening to each other’s heartbeats.

Gansey’s eyes started burning and a second later, hot tears were running over his cheeks because this was his family. This was everything and everyone he loved and how he would miss it once he was leaving this town.

Blue muffled, “This fucking hurts,” and somehow this confession made Gansey release a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. The entire night he had told himself it was okay. It was okay to leave. They would come back. There was no reason to be hurting. And though these weren’t necessarily lies, it still felt like the most truthful thing to say: It hurts. It fucking hurts to leave. Somehow this sentence gave more consolation than any sugarcoating could.

It fucking hurt and it was okay that it did.

When they stepped away from each other again, it was too dark to see each other’s faces, so Gansey couldn’t tell whether he was the only one who couldn’t hold his tears back. He heard Blue sniffing though, and Adam was clearing his throat, and Ronan wiped his hand over his face. 

“I guess that’s it,” Gansey said, laid his hand on Blue’s shoulder and squeezed it comfortingly.

“Don’t break anything while we are gone. Don’t let any strangers into the house,” she said, trying her best to make her voice sound normal. “And don’t have too much fun without us.”

“How could we.” Ronan bumped fists with Blue, before hugging her close, lifting her off her toes.

“Oh wait!” Gansey suddenly remembered something and hurried to the Camaro. “I almost forgot!” He opened the backdoor of his car and retrieved his treasured mint plant.

“What the hell?” Ronan asked as Gansey came back with the potted plant in his arms.

“I can’t take it with me. And I don’t trust my mother with plants. So, I thought you could care for it while I’m gone.”

Ronan eyed it skeptically. “Parrish is the plant guy, not me. It will be dead before you’ve even left the state.”

“You’ll figure it out, I’m sure.” Gansey shoved the pot into Ronan’s arms, who first rolled his eyes but eventually accepted it.

Because this wasn’t actually about the plant. The plant was just a means to an end. It was Gansey promising he would come back. Ronan taking it was promising he would still be here when he would.

They shared a brotherly handshake and some manly backslapping, while Blue embraced Adam and promised him to send postcards from all around America.

Then Blue grabbed Gansey’s hand and Gansey shouted “Excelsior!” one last time, before the two of them climbed into Gansey’s old Camaro.

Gansey had just inserted the key into the ignition switch as he spotted a small box that was lying on the dashboard. “What’s this?”

Blue shrugged so he grabbed the strange-looking package and carefully opened it. Inside was a tiny, unlabeled tube. Underneath it he found a wrinkled piece of paper wearing a very familiar handwriting: _Should keep everything that stings away. Don’t be a stranger, mi frater._

“Oh Ronan,” Blue said, smiling sadly.

_Oh, Ronan_ , Gansey thought and smiled at the little gift that could save his life.

He started the engine, the Pig roaring loudly and pulled out of the parking lot. Blue rolled her window down and waved to Adam and Ronan, only Adam returning it. Ronan was clutching Gansey’s mint plant to his chest, his facial expression hidden in the dark.

Gansey’s throat was tight as he drove down the driveway, leaving the Barns and his two best friends behind him. He glanced at the rearview mirror and saw Adam laying his arms around Ronan, pulling him into a quiet embrace, one hand on the back of his shaved head, Ronan’s fist clenching into Adam’s shirt.

There was something so intimate and heartrending about it, Gansey needed to look away.

_They would be okay._

He had always been incredibly glad about Ronan and Adam finding each other. And especially in this moment he couldn’t be more grateful for it. Like this it was a lot easier to leave, knowing they would care and be there for each other. Knowing they wouldn’t drift apart once Gansey left them behind – because even though Gansey had brought them to each other in the first place, he wasn’t the force that held them together anymore.

Somehow this new constellation – Gansey and Blue; Ronan and Adam – drove a wedge between them, but also drew them closer. Because as long as no hearts were broken, it would always be just the four of them. No one could drift away on their own. They would always pull each other close again. They would always find their way back to _this_ : The four of them. Tied together by magic, dreams and memories. By sleeping kings, sentient forests and foretold prophecies. By loss, love and everything else that had led them to this place, to this day, to this moment.

“Ready for the next chapter?” Blue said with tears in her eyes and a smile on her lips.

Gansey looked at her, at the girl that wasn’t interested in telling other people’s futures but was about to find out her own.

 _Their_ future.

They smiled at each other.

They were ready.

Because depending on where you began the story, this was where it started…

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading this far! I hope you enjoyed this little story about my beloved Gangsey! :) I would love to hear your thoughts! <3


End file.
